Forgiveness is a “big one”, and even though there are times when you just can’t find it within yourself to forgive, forgiveness is so important for healing and for peace.
You may find yourself asking, “Why should I forgive when they truly hurt me?” “How can I ever forget their words?”, which in turn, have caused you so much pain.
Let’s look at this quote by Najwa Zebian:
Today I decided to forgive you. Not because you apologized, or because you acknowledged the pain that you caused me, but because my soul deserves peace.
This quote says it all right there. We have to try letting go of what has caused us pain (even if it means forgiving silently in our mind), so that we can find peace within ourselves.
When you find yourself asking questions that tangle your mind, try to refocus your thoughts and energy to something or someone that brings joy to your life, and be grateful for the joys that are in your life, today in this moment!
It’s not easy to just try to forget someone or their hurtful words/actions out of your mind, but if you keep rethinking the situation in your head, I guarantee – it will bring you down and only cause you more stress and sadness inside.
Here, I share my thoughts below …
Don’t you find it especially easy these days to simply send someone a text message, or an email? Technology has made it so easy for people to not face each other with issues that are troubling them, whether it be through social media or a simple message – and I believe that this is an easy way out. Now don’t get me wrong, some text messages or emails are necessary and valid, but sometimes, it is better to just keep your thoughts to yourself until you are face to face with that person – which brings me to my next thought…
If you are not happy with someone or a situation, why not face them directly and have a decent conversation about it? If you are not happy with a current situation, why not face it directly and get to the root of it? Why let sadness, guilt, or anger form a messy web?
The facial expressions, the body language – they are all missed when sending a message; and therefore, how can one truly feel the true extent of the conversation? How can one truly know if the other person is being honest and understanding of the whole context put into place?
Simply put – if someone doesn’t agree with me, or I don’t agree with them – then isn’t a face to face conversation better then a message or a phone call?
And the thing is, if someone hurts you with words – is it not felt emotionally and mentally to the point where you start questioning yourself as to whether or not you are the one who is wrong?
Is that really necessary when we start to have self-doubt about our own beliefs? When we lack self-confidence in our decisions? When we have to start questioning our own relationships with others?
What you set your morals on – what you truly believe inside your heart – molds you into the person you are today…
If you stay true to your beliefs, and know that you have done nothing wrong, then why are you being blamed for being “ridiculous” or “irrational”? Not very nice. Not very nice at all…
When you take a moment to look at a situation – emotional and mental pain is worse than physical pain. Physical scars eventually go away where emotional mental scars, aren’t so easy. Words stick with you, making you feel unworthy and unloved. You see, you deserve to live your life without having to relive the pain that someone else has caused you. We all do…but how?
A quote by Maya Angelou …
I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.
The part of this quote that really stands out to me is, “people will never forget how you made them feel.” You see, I am one of those people who just can’t forget some things, especially when it feels like a knife just sliced through my heart. I can’t. And maybe I take things too seriously, or maybe it’s because I over-analyze – either way, it’s just me and the way I am. And if you fit that description – know that it doesn’t give anyone the right to take advantage of you, your family, or your situation.
Don’t allow people to walk all over you or your beliefs. You are better than that, and deserve so much more. It may not happen overnight, but in time, you will find peace. Find a way to block out those negative thoughts whether it be going for a walk, reading a book, dancing, singing, writing – whatever it is!
It may be hard and take some time to forgive and forget, but believe in yourself that it will get better. ❤️